So today was kind of, interesting.
I won't say I don't believe in signs, some signs that only you could understand, something that makes you come to realization of a decision you want to make, something that make you ponder about other options before you make a decision. Let me make it simple, you want to drink something and couldn't figure out what, and there suddenly Coca-Cola ads came out and you know you want it, get it?
Well, today I think I've got that kind of 'sign'.
What happened?
My teacher, who happened to be my distant relative, has a husband who runs a plant nursery. So he got a job to do at MRSM Mukah. Usually his work were mostly planting trees, but the MRSM asked him to design a little green area in front of the school's entrance. He admitted designing wasn't his area of expertise, so after a lot of thinking, he arrived at one thing, ME. So my teacher came to me this morning asking if I want to do the job, I'm thinking I have two days before going to Bintulu, and later to KL, so why not, she said it wasn't that big so I said yes. You see the sign now (If you hadn't go back to my previous posts please)?
Of course I'd say yes, it was an opportunity I or anybody wouldn't want to miss, especially a landscape architecture student like me (ehem-ehem!). And I'll get paid too, so naturally I thought this is probably a one-time opportunity for me to, showcase my talent! AHAHAHA I'm not saying I'm excellent at it! Don't get me wrong.
In previous post I told you I've been thinking about quitting school and go work instead (because my big plans need a little start-up money, not that it needs much, but still...). So my option was to quit school, or to continue school. And as I weigh in my options, this kind of thing happened, out of nowhere. Just days before I might finally said to my parents 'I gave up doing this'.
I'm not saying that I'm 100% is going to stay in school because of this, but it made me stop and to weigh in more on the staying options. I want to say I had enough, but now I really don't know. It's not like I've made a concrete decision or anything, but this kind of thing sure makes the see-saw hang in balance, neither sides is up or down. No one wins, it's a tie. And this tied decision is NOT GOOD.
I know at the back of my mind, I already what's my decision is, but I can't make this decision alone. But the thing that holds me back now is, 'how are my parents going to react to what I have to say?' At this point, ignorance isn't as bliss, now I fear of what I don't know, fear of the endless possibilities there are.
So what now?
Lemme share my BIG decision i made the year before. I face the same dilemma as to decide whether or not to stay with my work (which is obviously is not my cup of tea and im getting miserable every single day even though the pay is good) or to quit and pursue something that im good at.
ReplyDeleteAs when i face my parents and told them up front what of my intention, they without any thoughts and straight away rejecting my intention to quit my job. This is the typical parent type of wanting the best for their children and not wanting them to waste away their future.
But then again, i am the one who is going to work everyday and facing all those things everyday. The one who is suffering (literally speaking) is me.
after 3 months of thorough thought, i decided to draft my resignation letter. And i did quit my job. The sense of satisfaction is overwhelming.
but the hard part came right after that. The thing about starting anew is a very hard thing. One need to prepare mentally and financially (for me that is coz i got few commitments like car loans etc.)To start sumthing new is poven very hard and my burning desire was put off when my new job doesn't work out like i planned it to be. We planned and we tried, but when it doesn't work out, we need to find plan B. My plan B is to start job hunting again coz i need to finance myself and pay all my commitments.
Despite all that, im glad that im willing to get out of my comfort zone and venture into an unknown world of business. But then again, we are bound to circumstantial matters that exist and unavoidable. Yes, i fail but it wont stop me from starting over, which is to find a new job that is very similar to my line of work and get more experience so that i wont fall the second time.
My advice is that, make sure u think it thoroughly and have a plan B or C it things doesn't go ur way.
My wishes for you is all the best and good luck. Sometime we need to be selfish and pursue our dreams as long as it doesn't become troublesome to you or the ppl around you :P
Go for it Azam. I support you. If you think you can, then you can. Be positive and keep the drive alive every single day, and i pray for your success brother. :)