It's been quite a while since I wrote my last post, but here I an now, just blabbering~LOL! No, I'm kidding, I dont want to blabber, just that over this few weeks, things keep coming and going and leaving and changing and confusing, you know, those kinda stuff that makes your head spins like yo-yo or tops or wheels? I would say self-believe is important, I mean, if you wanna change, you need to believe in yourself so you won't revert back to the original(this goes for bad turns good kind of thing, not the other way round). This is my issue, I don't know what to believe for, I just don't know how to stand my ground, I'm sure if I join a debate team, I would root for my opponents instead!
It's not always I got into this, it's like flu, you don't get it often, but when you get it, it messes you like h**l(I'm not sure flu is the right metaphore, but it's more or less like that). And it's a month before new term starts, but I already felt like it's gonna be tomorrow. It feels like tomorrow I'm gonna jump on that plane, drop at the airport the next minute, then get to IIUM right afterwords. Simple isn't it? Very simple, but when my head starts tricking me into complications, all that seems troubling, problematic, complicated, just like algorithm, or chemical bonds(or chemicals got tangled because they're so messed up if you asked me).
I know there are some people who studied psychology out there, so my question is, is there anything that you study can be related to what I am dealing at the moment? Anything it's called? Or it is just me being stupid?LOL
OK, and wow, I'm just blabbering in the end!
Hahha.. u’re pretty messed up. Hahha.. kidding!
ReplyDeleteFirst of all, I’m no shrink(haha, Alhamdulillah! Phew~), i’m just kind enough to leave a comment, haha..
U know, i heard an interesting story, i just want to share. It’s about a boy. He told the world this:
“ And as a kid, I always wanted fun and more fun I could ever get. Nobody knows I had a dream. I had a mission. I was a bright boy, a top scorer of every examination I sat. I was eager to learn, and my parents were very helpful. I’m glad. I have no brothers or sisters, so I am their only hope, and I was considered as a very good investment and every time I achieved awards, I showered my stakeholders with pride.”
U see, he had so much to do, to learn, to fall and climb back up again.But growing up, i don’t know which expired mahallah ali’s yogurt he had eaten, he hadn’t been all that cheerful, as he used to be as a kid. sad.
U might think that i’m acting like i know u when i totally don’t get the whole point of this messed up thing. U’re right, i don’t know u. But i do get the point.
There is no need to worry about anything. N now u’d say : ‘it’s easier said than done!’ dude, if u got the time to whine, i believe u have plenty more to start doing something about it. All u have to do now is sort things out with urself. Be truthful. Sit down and think hard. That’s what I did. The mission you were talking about. What is it really for? Ask yourself lots and lots of question. Then find answers.
N that goal of yours, that alone should be enough to make u want to strive so damn hard to reach it. Have a goal so big that those things that bother u would seem so small. have some faith, and don’t let it shake!
I hope i don’t sound like a shrink. Hah!
p/s: u know what i found when i confronted myself? I found my mission. I found God... this isn’t because i’m a student of iium, so it’s no wonder i’d say something like this. But yeah, iium and its people do changed me. But with my own will and Allah’s will, of course, i’m a changed person. If you make God as ur goal, u’ve got nothing else to worry. N what i really mean by ‘making God ur goal’, now that, my new friend, is what u have to figure it out urself. Justathought, from me. Once you journey to find it, the things that’ll come at you are just amazingly brilliant. Even shits(haha, no joking!). Those horrible thing that happend to you, u’ll soon find the reason behind it. And i tell u, u’d be ever so grateful for that. I’m the living, walking example. U’ll soon find that your true goal will lead u to a far more greater goal – the akhirah(i really sound like iium student, don’t i? Uggh! I feel so awkwardly awkward! I did’t come from a religious school, or family for that matter, saying these things, i’m not quite used to it. Yet. but i’d say what i got to say, mind you! Hah!).
p/s2: i‘m looking forward to know the rest of the story. Post the rest of it already!:)
wow,im not very sure it was comment bcoc it's longer than my post~LOL! but thanks anyway, n what you quoted up there where just stories I made up, I'm not relating it to anyone, but thanks, you r rite, but as I've mention up there, it's not always I'm like that, most of the time I am a happy guy who care less about everything else but happiness but sometimes it just got to my head, you know...hahaha...and yes you don't know but it doeasn't matter really(like a counselor knows everything about you when you seek them for help, or a therapist God-forbid)...thanks
ReplyDeleteit IS longer than ur post, isn't it..
ReplyDeletehahaha..i just love to comment. than actually writing a post. :)
ahh, so i got it wrong this time..the story isn't about u? that is soo like me.ahhahha
so i guess the boy didn't take expired mahallah ali's yogurt?hmmm... hahhah
i know that these things don;t happen all the time, i mean how can it? honestly, i worry a lot about so many things. but i'm blessed with patient listeners.frens and family. they kinda absorb all those fear.like sponge. hahha...
hahaha..
p/s: i was a little worried that u'd get it all wrong.glad u didnt. :)
what about you write a post, feeling like u r commenting a post, or you just comment on the movies the books etc2....you know, since you love commenting~LOL! anyway, that yogurt is NOT expired, yogurt is suppose to taste sour, unless you ordered sweet yogurt, or other crappy yogurt you found on the market(you know, nestle's bliss etc2...LOL!)
ReplyDeleteWe all worry things,can't blame human being, and cant blame God, it's just human nature rite?hahaha...oh, what's my point?I don;t know, just saying(crap!!!)
p/s-what part did u worry I got it wrong anyway?